62. Merry Christmas!

The Ardent Brothers of the Holy Varlet at Our Lady’s Monastery at West Saugerties  had a nice Christmas Eve.  It’s after compline now and I snuck down here to the cellar as I like to do late at night.  Just to be with my thoughts.  I am now so busy with the practical chores of helping to keep this place afloat that this contemplative strangely has less and less time these days for contemplation.  Which of course is not thinking in any sense.  But anyway,  I just want to reflect on Christmas.

We don’t have a Santa Claus statue on the altar in the chapel, of course, because more important to us is the message of Christmas, which is Emmanuel, or He Is With Us.  That is the most important aspect of Christianity, at least to me.  That there is someone who cares, who is  with us through our lives and who shows up at the oddest times and through a variety of people.  Believe.  It’s happening all around you.

On my first Christmas away from home after joining the order, I was assigned to  a Retreat House in New Jersey and was serving on a  4 day Christmas Retreat for retired nuns … 40 of them!  I woke up in my cell-like room in the dark when my little travel alarm went off at 5:00 in the morning.   I knew it was Christmas morning and I thought back to all the times I had come awake on this day sure that a surprise gift or two waited for me under a glorious tree festooned with colored lights.  That there would be no tree or gift this morning made me feel doubly lonely and kind of sad, even at age 24.  When I turned on the bedside light a small box wrapped in Christmas paper was on the bedside table. Opening it, I discovered a pine cone inside, not the long cigar-like kind, but the round open style with square woody sprigs sprouting out.   The touches of pine sap had dried to a white frosting, making it very Christmas-like.  It was beautiful.  It was wonderful, and I still have it.

A half hour later I stood next to an old priest on the altar as he said Mass and I functioned as the altar server.  I looked out at the forty women in their religious habits and saw one who might have been the oldest smiling at me.  She was beaming and her hand gave a little wave.

“Thank you so much,” I said to the nun later at breakfast. “Why did you do that for me?”

“You’re the youngest here,” she said.  “You would miss Christmas presents the most.”

I was embarrassed.  “I guess I’ll get over it someday.”

“Don’t try so hard,” she said.  “Let it remind you on Christmas morning that you are waiting on His grace and what you need will be provided. He is with us and He won’t disappoint.”

Believe.  And it will happen all around you.
Emmanuel.   Merry Christmas.

Christmas Jig/Medley - Yo-Yo Ma, Natalie MacMaster & Friends



And here's Natalie MacMaster having fun in Ottawa!